Jim Stern Coaching

NEW JOB, NEW CITY… NO FRIENDS

A woman looking out to the city
A woman looking out to the city

After a quick pick-up in Brookline, I looked in my rearview mirror at her and asked, “So, how’s BU going?”She smiled and replied, “No, I’m out of school and working.”

Mary

“Oh, great! And what are you doing for work?” I asked. “I’m an animator, but not the kind you may be thinking,” Mary told me.

“Really? Tell me more.”  “I do tech animation for the pharma/bio-tech industry,” Mary says.

I thought that was unexpected as she did not look the type… much too hip. Tech animation is much like tech writing, a bit dry and aimed at a very specific—scientific, medical—audience.  “You offer life coaching?” Mary asks.

“Sure, what’s your issue?” I ask.

Making Friends

Mary wanted to know how to make friends but, I needed more information. Mary told me that she is moving to the suburbs for a new job. She had always lived in a city and wasn’t sure how she’d manage making friends living forty-five minutes outside of Philly.

I thought it was an interesting question and thought about my own life, at times I was in a similar situation and might have asked the very same question to my driver, though Uber did not exist back back then. I mean, who hasn’t been in this situation? Many people go through this challenge. I told Mary she has a few options:

  1. A 30-minute commute is not bad, so live only 10-15 minutes outside the city to be closer to the hustle and bustle.
  2. Since she was moving into a house with pre-existing roomies, I told her she could meet people through them.
  3. Her hobbies I uncovered were yoga, dance and cooking, so why not try to meet people through common interests?   I suggest “Meet-Ups” or classes.
  4. More involvement in her industry: join an industry association and get involved!
  5. Don’t forget about people in her company to connect with, as you only need one person as an activity partner.
  6. Online communities (dating apps, social media groups, meet-ups).

As we approach the airport, Mary thanked me and mentioned how she loves the ideas we talked about. She said she was really looking forward to starting a new chapter in her life.

Working Through Challenges

I was excited for Mary and it made me think back to those similar times in my life… the stress, excitement, new adventures and challenges! The unexpected and the unknown that lay ahead… and it warms my heart! Working through challenges like this is how we build character, become more confident and grow as individuals.

As Mary headed into the terminal, I couldn’t help think that all was going to be just fine for her… new Job, new City, and many new friends!

*Names and any identifying factors have been changed to protect the confidentiality of those mentioned.

© Driving Insights 2018+

 

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